Due to some things that have come up, our plans for “21 Days of Training” are being slightly delayed. We plan to implement what we can, where and when we can, and will pick a new start date for the commitment at a later date.
Obtained from the message board at the RGT website.
Our Preparation:
- Read Raising Godly Tomatoes by L. Elizabeth Krueger and To Train Up a Child by Michael and Debi Pearl to get in the training mindset.
- Remove everything from the home that doesn’t add to family harmony.
- Box up all that’s lying around with labels to deal with it later.
- Box up all but 3 things per child to play with.
- Plan simple meals in advance.
- Tackle all housework in order to keep up with only basic cleaning.
My Goals:
- Learn 100% consistency in dealing with my children’s misbehavior.
- Fall in love with my children
- Regain lost respect
- Basic obedience and a respect for authority
Additionally:
Some additional habits I’d like to create preceding my husbands arrival home are:
- Have dinner ready.
- Freshen up myself and the kids.
- Clear any clutter and dust.
- Minimize noise – being sure the laundry and vacuuming is done. Also encourage children in a quiet activity.
- Save petitions and in depth conversation for a more appropriate time than when he walks through the door. Make him comfortable and allow him to relax and unwind.
- Listen to him. Let him talk about his day.
The ultimate goal in this is: to make our home a place of peace and order, a sanctuary where he can renew himself in body and spirit.
My Responsibilities:
- Smile
- Speak quietly
- Make it enjoyable when possible
- Avoid leaving home
- Play soft classical music
- Go to bed early and rise before the children wake
- BE THE PARENT
- Don’t explain decisions
- Don’t whip with the Word
- Teach and train with the Word as a part of everyday life.
- Ask them what the consequence was for them having broken the scriptural principle.
- Scenario: “You did ___, am I right?” … “The rule is ___. You know the rule. For breaking the rule go to the bathroom.” Administer the spanks.
- Later in the week talk about principles that relate to the misbehavior as a part of every day Bible study and allow opportunity for the child to connect the lesson with their disobedience.
- If a child doesn’t know why they are being corrected then I should be teaching – not correcting.
- Meet out the punishment then the session is over – no preaching.
- When giving directions tell them what they can do – not what they can’t do. This will set them up for success.
- Say: “Leave that alone” instead of “Don’t touch that.”
- Say: “Be careful with your drink.” instead of “Don’t spill you’re drink.”
- Allow opportunities for failure: placing “trees of knowledge of good and evil” in their midst in order to give them a healthy respect for what happens when careless.
- Remember: my children are disobedient and disrespectful because I have not done my job. It is MY responsibility to teach and train them and any areas of disorder are more opportunities to teach and train them.
What I’ll Be Teaching/Training My Children:
- Respond pleasantly and immediately to direction or rebuke.
- Pay attention
- Be responsible and levelheaded
- Be respectful and submissive/obedient
- Pleasantly obey
- Be pleasant and cheerful – no grumbling, whining, moaning, or other bad attitudes.
- No appeals unless being chastised or restricted for something they didn’t do
- No back talk or arguing
The first three days will include intensive training with them by my side at all times. Then I’ll begin allowing short time periods of them alone for the following two days. By day seven we hope to be training for proper behavior in day to day life and by the end of the two weeks we should be just reinforcing the new training and including training as a part of normal life if and when it comes up.
Training a new concept:
- Explain new concept.
- Practice new concept.
- Occasionally throughout the day, engineer a practice of new concept.
- Throughout the week, have another practice session.
- Work on it at least once per week for 2-3 months so it becomes a habit.
My Schedule For First Two Weeks:
5:00am – Get ready and dress feet.
5:30am – Devotions
6:00am – Make Breakfast and do dishes
6:30am – Wake kids, eat breakfast
7:30am – Clear place, wash hands, brush teeth, get dressed.
8:00am – Exercises: jumping jacks, “simon says,” “yes ma’am,” “STOP.”
8:30am – Play in the room while still playing “yes ma’am,” and “STOP.”
9:30am – Snack time while doing blanket time.
10:00am – Build with legos while playing “yes ma’am,” and “STOP.”
10:30am – Change activity while still playing “yes ma’am,” and “STOP.”
11:00am – Sit at table while I prepare lunch – talking but no getting up.
12:00pm – Eat lunch, clear place, wash hands/face, brush teeth, etc.
1:00pm – Naptime – no talking, no giggling, be silent.
2:00pm – Whomever is awake watch a video until others wake.
3:00pm – Wake kids, eat snack.
3:30pm – Free play while still right with me.
4:00pm – Exercises.
4:30pm – Back to the table while I prepare dinner and do dishes.
5:30pm – Eat dinner, clear place, etc.
6:00pm – Clear clutter, vacuum and finish up laundry
6:45pm – Wash up and get in pj’s and read until Daddy gets home
8:00pm – Bedtime while I sit in doorway – quiet and watchful
8:30pm – Read to those who aren’t asleep yet or read to myself
9:00pm – Prepare for the following day
9:30pm – Bedtime
Week three we will begin going places to observe what additional training is needed and train at home in those areas.
During these 21 days I hope for our home to be full of joy and growth in the Lord. Constant loving fellowship and soft quiet spirits are our prayer for when we come out at the end of this! God is good!
I know we had adding a new problem area for day five, but we’ll be maintaining for the rest of the week. The problem areas we’re addressing are giving us our money’s worth! LOL I’m a bit sleepy; DS didn’t do so well last night. I’m not sure why but he was just not sleepy. We are hoping to switch around his schedule by eventually using the EASY schedule my sister shared with me (Eat, Activity, Sleep, Yourself?) but we’ll probably need to adjust to his for a little while, perhaps a couple weeks before he’s ready. Hopefully it works out seeing as I need the rest to prepare for bootcamp. Please continue to pray for this adjustment period in our lives. It’s wearing but I know it’s worth it! Blessings!
I started to slack during nap-time when I was on the phone. Instead of being diligent in my discipline (*blush*) I laid DD#2 down and left the room. Once I got back on track (nearly an hour later) and sat with her, she was out in under 3 minutes (up to that point she got up with just about every excuse while I threw out the common empty threats “stay in bed or you’ll get a spanking” (never did spank her); “I’m gonna be so upset if you get out of bed again!” (I responded with the same reaction next time with:); “I’m getting so frustrated! Do not get up again, STAY!”. I really need to work on my consistency and choosing appropriate times for phone conversations, computer time, and other personal desires I have, as well as the obvious… my temper. It’s not that no other time was better… it’s really because I was being selfish. The frustration was not because of her behavior (completely anyway) but more so because her lack of obedience interfered with what I wanted to do. So, in efforts to correct my children, we are all being taught some valuable lessons.
I’m encouraged after today. I’ve also started taking my B-Complex vitamins again which always helps with my mood and energy. I still don’t see any light at the end of the tunnel in regards to my youngest daughter’s attitude, but I’m trusting God will be faithful to His promise when I commit to the call. I need to do more intervention before the attitude turns sour so as to avoid them and allow opportunities for praise. Please continue to pray for us! We want to be a family that thoroughly blesses our Daddy (and dh! hehe).