A Defining Moment

For Christ died for sins once for all, the righteous for the unrighteous, to bring you to God. He was put to death in the body but made alive by the Spirit, through whom also he went and preached to the spirits in prison who disobeyed long ago when God waited patiently in the days of Noah while the ark was being built. In it only a few people, eight in all, were saved through water, and this water symbolizes baptism that now saves you also—not the removal of dirt from the body but the pledge of a good conscience toward God. It saves you by the resurrection of Jesus Christ, who has gone into heaven and is at God’s right hand—with angels, authorities and powers in submission to him.
1 Peter 3:18-22

This passage prompted me to search for what I read at my baptism. Instead, I came across the encouraging scriptures that were read to me that day in November of 2002. I didn’t much understand them at the time, but reading them now, I see they were to be the scriptures I’d stand on for many years to follow. The links I’ve included are of different blogs that confirm what God had been preparing me for the moment He washed me from all my sins.

I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in his sufferings… Philippians 3:10

I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. Philippians 3:12-14

Therefore, [Kayley], stand firm! Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain. 1 Corinthians 15:58

Before becoming a Christian, all surrounding me often would praise my confidence, compassion, my intelligence, and ‘maturity’; but once I stood on a foundation of faith, many began looking at me in a different light. Where once they saw me as confident, they now believed I was arrogant (Arrogance vs. Confidence – Philippians 3:13-16); where once they saw compassion, they now believed I was intolerant; intelligent to naive; and mature to immature.

I embraced the loss, with Christ’s help, and now I see that I, in fact have been given everything in Christ Jesus (Who Am I – Philippians 3:7-10). All that He is, is worth all that is lost (Worthwhile Pursuits – Philippians 3:13-16). He is enough.

As a New Creation (Philippians 3:12-21), having been baptized and buried with Christ (Romans 6:1-14), I have been made new; taking on the godly characteristics of living. My confidence was in myself and dependence was on the love and acceptance of my friends and family. It changed into a confidence in Christ alone, leaving me reliant on the Holy Spirit and fellow believers. My compassion, once an empathy for the weak and wanting had changed to a deep desire to help all with a heart longing for their salvation and transformation. My intelligence limited by my personal experiences became knowledge, wisdom, and understanding of the truth, of sin, and of good. My maturity changed as that I no longer received advice from the ungodly; the aged, the educated, and the experienced had only a worldly wisdom that couldn’t bring me to the intimate place with Christ that I desired. It was the truth of God’s Word that transformed my heart and gave me newness of mind.

Now being a wife and mama, my calling was made much more clear to me after searching for where I’d fit in. I looked everywhere but at home but finally realized my purpose was here waiting for me all along. It was all tied together when a friend recommended the book Passionate Housewives Desperate for God by Jennie Chancey and Stacey McDonald and I, excited and encouraged, took on my blessed calling (Being a Keeper at Home – Philippians 2-8).

It was and still is hard! But God is steadfast with His helpful and guiding hand. He showed me that my Labor in the Lord is Not in Vain (1 Corinthians 15:58 ) and that any frustrations along the way are helping me grow into the woman I’ve been created to be. So I’m reminded again to stand firm and not to give in to my fleshy desires to give up the fight. Baptism is more than mere symbolism, it’s the very expression of what Christ did for us – buried for our sins and risen for eternal life – washed and made new!

If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose.

Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.

Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus: Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient to death— even death on a cross!

Therefore God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every name, that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.

Philippians 2:1-11

Be a Blessing

Being a child of God, caring for our husbands, raising our children and keeping our homes. Is it really possible to be productive, achieve goals, and change habits in the midst of so many responsibilities?

Yes! If we’re doing all the other stuff because of those responsibilities.

God, and this call He’s placed on my life as wife, mother, and keeper of my home, are my reason for being.

It is my lifelong goal to be all that God has purposed me for, and there are always new areas for growth and improvement. I know there are some readers who are just starting out in their careers in such a calling as being a child of God, a wife, mother, and keeper of the home, or even a ways from it and I hope you’ll benefit from this post and avoid the detours and wrong turns I have taken along the way!

First it is important to realize that fulfilling your role as wife, mother, and keeper of the home, is not separate from being a child of God, nor separate from each other. They all tie into each other and if one is being ignored all the others suffer in one way or another.

Being a blessing to God can be as simple as bringing your husband a cold drink, kissing that boo-boo, or picking up that single toy off the floor. It can also be as elaborate as serving your husband supper when you’d rather be sitting down, reading to the kids a few words at a time while training them to sit and listen, or getting that last load washed and dried so you can sit and rest. The little sacrifices are as great to God as the greatest sacrifice and all are treasures to those they touch.

How can you be great in this calling? Here’s my list (not in any particular order):

1. Put their interests first, always. Do you enjoy doing something that is unhealthy for your body, mind, or spirit? If so, it’s not good for them. You are expressing your respect toward your husband (or lack thereof) and setting an example for your children with everything you do. It is important to take care of yourself (otherwise you can’t take care of them), and important to think of the longterm effects of your actions.

2. Guard the home. As a keeper of the home, one of your main roles is to guard your family from physical and spiritual harm. There are many ways you need to do this: Physical – keeping home clean and healthy, teaching the children good safety habits, using your seatbelt, make sure they use a car seat if below a certain age & weight, etc; and Spiritual – guarding who they spend time with (and who you spend time with), practice a worshipful and reverent attitude, avoid sin, etc.

3. Spend time with them. When our husbands come home, it can be tempting to go and hide to get rest; often we’re tired and just want to relax, but this is the only time we have with them during the weekdays, often, and you shouldn’t waste it. Take this time to find out about their day, lay on the couch with them. On weekends, devote as much time as possible to them. Take advantage of the time you have with him. The kids need their parents to spend time together and to spend time with them.

4. Play. Don’t just watch TV. Show them how to have fun. See 100 Ways to Have Fun with Your Kids for Free or Cheap.

5. Change your mind. Things that are traditionally considered duties that are menial or mundane are not insignificant — cooking meals, doing dishes, dusting, changing diapers, feeding, bathing, rocking babies to sleep in the middle of the night, etc are a part of humbleness and servant hood. We should no longer look at it as a low position when we serve our families.

6. Read the Bible together. This is one of the most important things you can do. Establishing a habit of being in the Word is crucial to our personal relationships to Christ and reading together is crucial to the unity of the family.

7. Stand by your husband. Don’t contradict him in front of others, don’t fight with him in front of them, and most definitely don’t ever disrespect him with words or looks of unkindness – ever. How you treat your husband affects your children, your home, and the oneness of your marriage. As one, you are teaching your children reverence and respect, love, sacrifice, and loyalty. Always work with your husband and never undermine or usurp his authority.

8. Teach them selflessness. Show them (don’t just tell them) how to be selfless by living selflessly.

9. Teach them about finances. From an early age, you should teach them the value of money and how to manage money properly, the importance of the tithe and giving to those in need, how to save money to reach a goal and making wise investments, and later how to earn money. Being a good steward with money helps us to be good stewards with other responsibilities we bear.

10. Pray for them. Let go of the things that you can’t and shouldn’t control. Let God lead you in each decision made, action taken, and word spoken. Do not walk in your ignorance but walk in the wisdom of the Lord!

A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies. Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life….

She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue. She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: “Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all.” Proverbs 31:10-12; 26-29

An Exhortation

If you are single and seeking; a married man or woman, no matter how unfortunate their circumstance, is not “the one”.

It’s not about you.

If they appear interested, it is not about you; they are longing for sweet intimacy with their spouse. They are not with you because their spouse is a horrible, uncaring person who doesn’t understand them; their marriage is under attack and you have the choice of whether or not to participate in their destruction by enticing and appealing to them.

Don’t be deceived.

The enemy wants nothing more than to separate such a holy union as marriage and he cares nothing for all involved in order to accomplish this.

The two of you are NOT compatible, God is NOT answering any prayers – this person is not “the one”; do not listen to these lies!

What God IS doing is investing time on helping to heal their marriage and strengthening them in their trials. His answer is to save their marriage, not let it die. You pursuing such a person is as working AGAINST the Father.

You are not more interesting, attractive, or fabulous than their spouse. While it may feel good to “feel in love” and that you are in someway helping this person – you are only filling a void for their spouse, not a place of desire for you. They are not in love with you.

You are only being used to seduce them; you are disposable and replaceable – your longings, fantasies, and loneliness are being used by the enemy. You are NOT meant to be with this person.

It “feels” so right.

I know, I know, the “feelings” are so strong. How could you “feel” such passionate “feelings” for someone and it not be right?! It doesn’t matter, it’s not about you.

Stop lying to yourself.

Step back, be honest with yourself, reflect on what you are doing to a family, perhaps to children if they have any, and to another man or woman. Why, also, would you want to do this to yourself? They promised to love, honor, be faithful to and cherish each other. Do you really want to destroy the hope of them doing so by being selfish? Walk away – run, even.

God loves you and He has a plan and purpose for your life: of building up, not tearing down; of family, not loneliness; of hope and not desperation and confusion.

Turn to Christ.

“Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.”

Matthew 19:4-6

Do Not Tolerate “Jezebel”

A devotion on the deceptions of the enemy through distortion of the truth in reference to grace and law.

Nevertheless, I have this against you: You tolerate that woman Jezebel, who calls herself a prophetess. By her teaching she misleads my servants into sexual immorality and the eating of food sacrificed to idols. I have given her time to repent of her immorality, but she is unwilling. Revelation 2:20-21

Jezebel: [The wife of Ahab king of Israel] A bold, vicious woman; a termagant. Also synonymous with a false teacher or false prophet.

Bold: In a bad sense, too forward; taking undue liberties; over assuming or confident; lacking proper modesty or restraint; rude; impudent.

Vi”cious:

1. Defective; imperfect; as a system of government vicious and unsound.

2. Addicted to vice; corrupt in principles or conduct; depraved; wicked; habitually transgressing the moral law; as a vicious race of men; vicious parents; vicious children.

3. Corrupt; contrary to moral principles or to rectitude; as vicious examples; vicious conduct.

4. Corrupt, in a physical sense; foul; impure; insalubrious; as vicious air.

5. Corrupt; not genuine or pure; as vicious language; vicious idioms.

6. Unruly; refractory; not well tamed or broken; as a vicious horse.

Termagant: Tumultuous; turbulent; boisterous; furious; quarrelsome; scolding

Jezebel is used in this passage as an epithet (i.e. a dog as “Man’s best friend”) for a prominent woman in the congregation who has undermined loyalty to God by promoting tolerance toward pagan practices. She is a spiritual mother to all who pursue antinomian doctrines (a person who maintains they are freed from the moral law by virtue of grace as set forth in the gospel). We should not tolerate a false teacher; anyone who compromises the Word of God and the faith of His children.

We are justified by God’s grace. God’s grace is vital as it makes us heirs to the hope; the confident expectation of eternal life (Romans 3:24; Galatians 5:4; Titus 3:7). We are not to set aside the grace of God – otherwise Christ died for nothing (Galatians 2:21).

Because of this justification through Jesus we are made pure; sinless (1 John 3:4). We are dead to sin. Sin is no longer our master because we are no longer under the law but under grace. This does not eliminate the law over our lives; we become slaves to righteousness rather than to sin (Romans 6:14-18). The law then becomes our delight! We are freed from the law of sin and death by the law of the Spirit of life. We now live according to the Spirit and by the sinful nature no more ((Romans 8:1-4).

The law is not done away with in Christ’s death. It is made alive in us. Without grace, our labor is in vain; without the law of the Spirit of life, we are slaves to the law of sin and death. One cannot serve two masters (Matthew 6:24; Luke 16:13).

Do not tolerate that woman Jezebel; she is poison to God’s children! Do not be deceived by the lies of men in the end times. They creep in and capture foolish women burdened in the midst of their failures; their sins. They entice through the lusts of the flesh. Be on your guard; do not allow them in your hearts, minds, homes, or look on with your eyes or else you will be one of their victims!

This know also, that in the last days perilous times shall come. For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good, traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God; having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away. For of this sort are they which creep into houses, and lead captive silly women laden with sins, led away with divers lusts, ever learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth. 2 Timothy 3:1-7

Voddie Baucham on the role of the church

AFAJournal: What role does the local church play in changing the culture through multi-generational faithfulness*?
Baucham: I believe the church is a family of families. One way we have gone astray is that we see the church as a corporation that breaks us into individual groups. We have something for this group and something for that group and we are breaking families apart when we get to the church house. We’re expecting church programs to disciple our children rather than that happening in the home in the context of the family.

*The concept that God intends for the home to be where Christian children are spiritually nurtured into mature adults who can influence all spheres of life for Christ. At the same time, every new generation of Christian parents must pass their faith on to their own children.

Quoted from the article Christian Activism Begins at Home by the American Family Association.

Amen, Voddie Baucham! Discipling, training, and the establishment of faith in children must begin within the home. Parents need to stop relying on the church to do this for them and take on the responsibility they’ve been given by God to train their children! As Mr. Baucham stated, instead, the church’s role is “to come alongside families and help them fulfill their call.”

Our young men need training from home and especially through the examples of their fathers to be self-controlled, worthy of respect, temperate, and sound in faith, in love and in endurance.

Our young women also need training from the home and especially through the examples of mothers to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be keepers of their home, to be kind and to be subject to their husbands.

This goes deeper than just a harmony in the home or a ministry to the world – but represents Christ in such a way that when we fail to be as God has called us to be, Satan gains a foothold on someones heart. This can result in a malignant behavior towards the Word of God, toward the family, or toward the Holy Spirit.

This is a great calling on the family and should not be looked upon as the work of the church. As Mr. Baucham stated, the church is a family of families and we must remember we all have a role in that!

Amen!

The Life of a Virtuous Wife

God:

Keep your eyes on Jesus, who both began and finished this race we’re in. Study how he did it because he never lost sight of where he was headed—that exhilarating finish in and with God—he could put up with anything along the way: Cross, shame, whatever. And now he’s there, in the place of honor, right alongside God. When you find yourselves flagging in your faith, go over that story again, item by item, that long litany of hostility he plowed through. That will shoot adrenaline into your souls!

In this all-out match against sin, others have suffered far worse than you, to say nothing of what Jesus went through—all that bloodshed! So don’t feel sorry for yourselves. Or have you forgotten how good parents treat children, and that God regards you as his children?

My dear child, don’t shrug off God’s discipline, but don’t be crushed by it either.
It’s the child he loves that he disciplines; the child he embraces, he also corrects.

God is educating you; that’s why you must never drop out. He’s treating you as dear children. This trouble you’re in isn’t punishment; it’s training, the normal experience of children. Only irresponsible parents leave children to fend for themselves. Would you prefer an irresponsible God? We respect our own parents for training and not spoiling us, so why not embrace God’s training so we can truly live? While we were children, our parents did what seemed best to them. But God is doing what is best for us, training us to live God’s holy best. At the time, discipline isn’t much fun. It always feels like it’s going against the grain. Later, of course, it pays off handsomely, for it’s the well-trained who find themselves mature in their relationship with God.

So don’t sit around on your hands! No more dragging your feet! Clear the path for long-distance runners so no one will trip and fall, so no one will step in a hole and sprain an ankle. Help each other out. And run for it!

Work at getting along with each other and with God. Otherwise you’ll never get so much as a glimpse of God. Make sure no one gets left out of God’s generosity. Keep a sharp eye out for weeds of bitter discontent. A thistle or two gone to seed can ruin a whole garden in no time. Watch out for the Esau syndrome: trading away God’s lifelong gift in order to satisfy a short-term appetite. You well know how Esau later regretted that impulsive act and wanted God’s blessing—but by then it was too late, tears or no tears. Hebrews 12:2-17 (MSG)

Husband:

Be good wives to your husbands, responsive to their needs. There are husbands who, indifferent as they are to any words about God, will be captivated by your life of holy beauty. What matters is not your outer appearance—the styling of your hair, the jewelry you wear, the cut of your clothes—but your inner disposition.

Cultivate inner beauty, the gentle, gracious kind that God delights in. The holy women of old were beautiful before God that way, and were good, loyal wives to their husbands. Sarah, for instance, taking care of Abraham, would address him as “my dear husband.” You’ll be true daughters of Sarah if you do the same, not anxious or intimidated. 1 Peter 3:1-6 (MSG)

Children:

Write these commandments that I’ve given you today on your hearts. Get them inside of you and then get them inside your children. Talk about them wherever you are, sitting at home or walking in the street; talk about them from the time you get up in the morning to when you fall into bed at night. Tie them on your hands and foreheads as a reminder; inscribe them on the doorposts of your homes and on your city gates. Deuteronomy 6:6-9 (MSG)

Home:

She watches over the ways of her household, and does not eat the bread of idleness. Proverbs 31:27 (NIV)