I Will Not Tolerate It!

Jezebel:

Another woman’s husband is HER husband for a reason. SHE is to LOVE, HONOR and, CHERISH him. What you think of him really holds NO value whatsoever. Stop trying to cause dissensions within the family!

Fellow married ladies:

But avoid foolish disputes, genealogies, contentions, and strivings about the law; for they are unprofitable and useless. Reject a divisive man after the first and second admonition, knowing that such a person is warped and sinning, being self-condemned. Titus 3:9-11

Do not tolerate that woman Jezebel; she is poison to God’s children! Do not be deceived by the lies of men in the end times. They creep in and capture foolish women burdened in the midst of their failures; their sins. They entice through the lusts of the flesh. Be on your guard; do not allow them in your hearts, minds, homes, or look on with your eyes or else you will be one of their victims!

This know also, that in the last days perilous times shall come. For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good, traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God; having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away. For of this sort are they which creep into houses, and lead captive silly women laden with sins, led away with divers lusts, ever learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth. 2 Timothy 3:1-7

Ladies, love your husband; and if you don’t know how, learn to love them. This is pleasing to the Lord!

Lord, I pray for every woman who has a Jezebel in her life; a deceitful, manipulative, selfish woman who cares to achieve the lusts of the flesh and act as the serpent did in the garden. Her heart seeks only power, rank, and selfish ambitions. This is not to your glory! May you cover these women and send strength to those who are vulnerable. May we refuse any form of her godlessness in our homes. In Jesus name. Amen.

An Exhortation

If you are single and seeking; a married man or woman, no matter how unfortunate their circumstance, is not “the one”.

It’s not about you.

If they appear interested, it is not about you; they are longing for sweet intimacy with their spouse. They are not with you because their spouse is a horrible, uncaring person who doesn’t understand them; their marriage is under attack and you have the choice of whether or not to participate in their destruction by enticing and appealing to them.

Don’t be deceived.

The enemy wants nothing more than to separate such a holy union as marriage and he cares nothing for all involved in order to accomplish this.

The two of you are NOT compatible, God is NOT answering any prayers – this person is not “the one”; do not listen to these lies!

What God IS doing is investing time on helping to heal their marriage and strengthening them in their trials. His answer is to save their marriage, not let it die. You pursuing such a person is as working AGAINST the Father.

You are not more interesting, attractive, or fabulous than their spouse. While it may feel good to “feel in love” and that you are in someway helping this person – you are only filling a void for their spouse, not a place of desire for you. They are not in love with you.

You are only being used to seduce them; you are disposable and replaceable – your longings, fantasies, and loneliness are being used by the enemy. You are NOT meant to be with this person.

It “feels” so right.

I know, I know, the “feelings” are so strong. How could you “feel” such passionate “feelings” for someone and it not be right?! It doesn’t matter, it’s not about you.

Stop lying to yourself.

Step back, be honest with yourself, reflect on what you are doing to a family, perhaps to children if they have any, and to another man or woman. Why, also, would you want to do this to yourself? They promised to love, honor, be faithful to and cherish each other. Do you really want to destroy the hope of them doing so by being selfish? Walk away – run, even.

God loves you and He has a plan and purpose for your life: of building up, not tearing down; of family, not loneliness; of hope and not desperation and confusion.

Turn to Christ.

“Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.”

Matthew 19:4-6

It Takes a Strong Woman

Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.” 1 Peter 3:7

What does this passage mean? Let’s break it down.

Weaker, from the Gk. word Asthenes (as-then-ace’), means feeble, impotent, sick, weak. It is from a (as a negative particle) and the base of sthenoo; strengthless (in various applications, literal, figurative and moral) — more feeble, impotent, sick, without strength, weak(-er, -ness, thing).

KJV translates this passage with “weaker vessel” which is from the Gk. word skeuos (skyoo’-os), in regards to implement, equipment or apparatus (literally or figuratively (specially, a wife as contributing to the usefulness of the husband)) — goods, sail, stuff, vessel.

So then, are we to see in the Word of God that women are without strength? NO! Read the passage – it says weaker not weak! Generally, women are weaker than men! Why is this such an issue? Why are many so adamant in their stance about being as strong as or stronger than men? Why does it really matter? Why does this equality (or superiority) to men ignite such fierce passion in so many women?

It takes a strong woman to get off their high horse and humble themselves when they’d rather express how self-sufficient they are. It takes a strong woman to be kind and gentle when they would rather make their point and prove their abilities. It takes a strong woman to put aside her own wants for the wants of someone else. These are NOT weak qualities! It takes a strong woman to submit, sacrifice, and give! It takes a strong woman to control herself. It takes a strong woman to care for the needs of her family.

It takes a strong woman.

Our role is precious and it’s hard work that is VALUABLE, IMPORTANT, and VITAL to creation and to God’s plan. Why women feel the need to take on a role that has been set apart for someone else is beyond me.

Not to compare the family unity to that of a business, but just to grasp the idea of responsibility and vitality in roles I am going to address this area. Consider a creator or owner of a business, generally his employees would cover a multitude of tasks – Human Resources, Accounting, Marketing and Sales, Operations, Administration, etc. God, as the creator of the family, has put the husband in charge of the jobs that must get completed efficiently and effectively, applying himself in the area of leading, providing, and protecting. He must lead by guiding, instructing, directing and counseling the family. He must provide by looking out for the welfare of his family in advance to specific dangers, to make ready for future tasks, to prepare for life, and to supply and furnish what is necessary for their needs. He must protect by defending his family, to guard, cover, and shield them.

In this role he will establish the roles of the wife in how she can help him accomplish these things. This will look different for every family. Just because a person is a manager of a business, does not make him more important or more vital to how the business will be run than those he delegates to, but he bears the responsibility of making sure the job is done successfully, orderly and without chaos.

Titus 2 gives a great glimpse into how wives will contribute to their own families. As younger women we are to strive to be as the aged women – learning by their examples to be godly wives and mothers; holy women of God. It tells us in verse 3 to have a visible demeanor of suitable behavior according to what is holy and reverent; being honest and refusing to make false accusations; not becoming intoxicated on wine; teaching what is worthy, right, and good. In verse 4 and 5, it goes on to say to be self-controlled, moderate in opinion and passion, and cautious with discretion; to love our husbands with affection and tenderness; to be tender and loving to our children; to be virtuous – modest, clean, pure; to be with devout reverence to God, our Lord; to stay at home for the purpose of keeping them clean and orderly, guarding what comes in and to keep watch over the family; and to be submissive to our husbands and help them in the way they need help (please see my post on submission). All of this so as to not disgrace, degrade, or blaspheme the Word of God.

Men and women are important – each job that they have is crucial to the functionality of family and how well it thrives. God truly knew what He was doing when He created man and woman. He has a flawless design for family. We can experience that if we’ll only surrender to it.

Obey God and Submit!

A lot of people get hung up on what the Bible calls for in a wife. Especially when stated for her to “submit” to the “authority” of her own husband.

Many get hung up on these words and have pointed their hasty and defensive fingers at Christians stating such words as though they had concocted them up themselves and even make declarations that women are equal to men in every sense and that women are not inferior nor second class citizens. What they don’t know is that this is not even close to what the Word of God is saying; nor many of the Christians who have such passion in Biblical womanhood.

First, submit and being submissive are defined as the following:

Gk. Hupotasso (hoop-ot-as’-so) – to subject, put in subjection: From hupo and tasso; to subordinate; reflexively, to obey — be under obedience (obedient), put under, subdue unto, (be, make) subject (to, unto), be (put) in subjection (to, under), submit self unto.

Webster’s Revised Unabridged Dictionary (1913 + 1828 ) says this about submitting:

“To yield, resign or surrender to the power, will or authority of another; with the reciprocal pronoun.”

Next, to clarify, the Word of God calls everyone to submit to the governing authorities (Romans 13:1-7), to one another (Ephesians 5:21), to Christ (Ephesians 5:24), and to our parents and to the Father (Hebrews 12:9; James 4:7). Even the master’s and rulers must submit (1 Peter 2:13-14) to those placed in authority above them no matter how high their position is! It is a calling for all.

This is the same type of submission we are to have with our husbands (Ephesians 5:22-33, Colossians 3:18-25, 1 Peter 3:1-7 etc.).

For those of us who see the value in God’s created order outside the home as well as inside, we desire to learn more about what God is asking of us, more than any worldly rights or establishments. In 1 Peter 3:5-6 we see how the women of the past presented themselves holy: by being submissive to their husbands and obeying them.

Obey is defined as followed:

Gk. Hupakouo (hoop-ak-oo’-o) – obey, hearken: From hupo and akouo; to hear under (as a subordinate), i.e. To listen attentively; by implication, to heed or conform to a command or authority — hearken, be obedient to, obey.

Webster’s Revised Unabridged Dictionary (1913 + 1828 ) says this about the word obey:

“To give ear to; to execute the commands of; to yield submission to; to comply with the orders of.”

Both obedience and submission is a choice of action; a yielding to. We are called by God (not man), to do both. It is because of this we should submit to the Will of God and do so. We should not disobey this calling because the world tells women we have the “right” and “freedom” to do as we want. God does not call us to live the lives we want or even to be who we want to be. He calls us for His righteousness. Which only results in something greater of ourselves than we had considered with what we wanted.

What about the wife of a man who is not submitting or obeying God? The Word says this:

Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives, when they observe your chaste conduct accompanied by fear. 1 Peter 3:1-2

For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy. 1 Corinthians 7:14

If you married to a disobedient husband you are still to do your part. It is still your responsibility to obey and submit to God, even when your husband does not.

Those of us who have been raised with Christ are His chosen; His dearly loved and he commands us to clothe ourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience (Colossians 3:12). We are representing Christ with all that we do and are to bear the fruit that being in abiding worship results in:

Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control (Galatians 5:22-23a).

We, as Christian wives are called to have a sacrificial love for our husbands; the rarest of its kind with a willingness to sacrifice all and choosing never to see it as a sacrifice – this is the type of love God has for us. We are called to experience joy in our marriage; a cheerful and glad delight! We are called to experience peace; a rest and prosperity that only the love of Christ can give. We are called to have patience; to persevere through any painful trials without murmurs and discontent. We are to be kind and good and faithful; to express in our character usefulness, assurance, and loyalty. We are to remember that Christ came to serve and as such humble ourselves in gentleness. We are called to have self-control; the conscience decision to give ourselves to another, our husbands.

See this opportunity as a blessing. We get to live in a way that Christ did – love in a way that God does – and experience all that He is going to do! Praise God!

Special Friends

Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their labor. For if they fall, one will lift up his companion. But woe to him who is alone when he falls, For he has no one to help him up. Again, if two lie down together, they will keep warm, but how can one be warm alone? Though one may be overpowered by another, two can withstand him. And a threefold cord is not quickly broken. Ecclesiastes 4:9-12

A husband and wife can face the challenges of the world together. God created Eve to help Adam.

The LORD God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” Genesis 2:18

As husband’s and wives we need to remember the valuable role we play in our spouses lives. We need each other to catch us when we fall. We need each other to stay comforted and warm; encouraged. We need each other to battle against the wicked schemes of the enemy.

Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ. Galatians 6:2

The Perfect Design

“My gender, my womanhood is not a biological accident.” –Nancy Leigh DeMoss

We were created intentionally and for a great purpose by God. In Genesis, on the sixth day that He was designing and detailing this earth (Genesis 1:26-31), man and woman were created. We see He created us for a special purpose, a great responsibility and with a great job at hand.

The perversion of manhood and womanhood inside the marriage relationship in this modern day era has become quite prominent. God intended oneness and unity for the husband and wife, while new ideas of old strive for individuality and self-sufficiency.

The common and most relevant issue in today’s culture is the battle of the sexes. This perversion is destroying marriages and families. Sin has been allowed to rule our homes rather than taking hold of the created order God intended. Replacing our hearts for self with a heart for God and His perfect Way is where we must start.

Because of sin, shame is prevalent in our marriage relationships. We struggle with experiencing the God intended raw intimacy that was once experienced in the Garden between Adam and Eve and with God. The sin they committed was the very beginning of a perverted world.

The character qualities that God gave us as men and women were used in disobedience. The woman, deceived by her tempter through distortion of her created design, disobeyed God. She then influenced the man, who stepped down from his own role of protector and leader, and he disobeyed as well. They went against the Word of the Lord and the oneness, unity, and close intimacy of the marriage God created was broken.

This was the beginning of “the battle of the sexes”.

Sin has affected all the generations to follow. It started with them, and continues with us. The attack against the intended desire of God for the man and woman living in oneness and harmony started from the beginning of creation. We as women will struggle with the desire to control our husbands, while they will struggle with ruling over us in ways that are sometimes inappropriate.

This original design has not been lost; it was not done away with. The man was given the responsibility to work and take care of the garden God had planted in Eden (Genesis 2:15). The wife was to be his helper suitable to him (Genesis 2:18), a helper in the ways her own husband needed (Ephesians 5:22).

Are we bound by this sin? Must we continually live under this curse we placed on ourselves? The Word says that the Holy Spirit that inhabits those who dedicate their lives to following Christ, restores that torn relationship with God bringing life and peace (Romans 8:6).

With the Holy Spirit, we are given new clarity of perspective that was lost when sin took place. We can see His created order for what it is, we are given the ability to see God’s will for our lives and understand His heart and mind. Eve was deceived and we can avoid the same fall. We can triumph over doubt, and experience restoration, gaining perspective through dreams and visions (Joel 2:28-32) and through the living Word (Ephesians 1:17&18).

Though we lost the distinct abilities that God originally intended for us at the fall, we have been enabled to lived the Christ-like life with a privileged authority, a dominion over our environment, no longer dominated by things in our lives but empowered (Gk. dunamis: ability) by the Holy Spirit (Luke 24:49). In addition, Adam and Eve sacrificed their service and responsibility, but as we allow God’s power to run through our lives we can now experience the domestic life with the family relationship unhindered as God desired for us.

As children of God, we have been given the ability that was lost to serve in our responsibilities with love and grace; to be productive, responsive, and faithful in our tasks; to relate to people with the grace of God in our relationships and multiplied joys of domestic potential. Our original relationship with God, walking and talking daily with Him, has been restored; we are given supernatural capacities for intimate communion and worship as transparency is returned to us.

God intended for this intimate relationship with his children. We hold a great value in God’s eyes though we’ve done nothing to earn it. We are unworthy, yet He adores us and longs for our love in return. He wants intimacy with us and has provided a way for us to do so by the death and resurrection of His Son, Jesus Christ and sending us power through the Holy Spirit. The marriage relationship is representative of this love He has for us (1 Peter 3:1-7).

Societal views of manhood and womanhood is contrary to what Scriptures show us. Many are confused and deceived in how to use the special abilities we have in their appropriate and created manner. After reading several books and articles by different men and women of God, it is clear that the world priorities are seeping into our Christian culture and Satan’s desire to steal, kill, and destroy God’s beloved plan (John 10:10) has not ceased.

Satan sneaks and prowls, waiting and watching for an opportunity to destroy his prey; waiting for us to let our guard down. He has come to steal the truth from us and unfortunately has not gone without victory.

Many have fallen into his trap of deception, experiencing a false sense of freedom, fullness, and fruitfulness which in reality is bondage, emptiness, and idleness. Many have come to love the satisfying messages rather than the truth. They are blinded by what they want and how they perceive things that they have closed their eyes and hearts to truth as a whole. They take in what makes them “feel” good temporarily, but ignore the information that is so crucial to eternal joy.

God knows who we are, and He knows what He has purposed for us. He created us with perfect intent and gave us a clear guide in the Word and through His Holy Spirit how to do it. We must stop relying on our own thoughts and ask our very Creator about His creation (Psalm 92:5; Isaiah 55:8-9) and implement His truth in our lives (Psalm 15) no matter how counter-cultural it is in our world today.

We were created for a specific purpose. We, both men and women, are needed! As Nancy Leigh Demoss so profoundly stated, our womanhood is not a biological accident. Neither is manhood. We were knit together in our mother’s womb by God Himself, woven together in the depths of the earth (Psalm 139:13- 15). When we believe we have no value, we devalue God Himself, for surely God wouldn’t create something that is useless!

‘God blessed them and said to them, “Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air and over every living creature that moves on the ground.”’ Genesis 1:28

God then says in verse 31 that “everything that he had made…was very good.”

Everything God made within its original design is very good. When we attempt to revise his original design, we incorporate ignorance with perfection – which inevitably means to turn away from God’s perfection. This is the very definition of apostasy (Deuteronomy 13:1-5; Jude 1:5-19; 2 Thessalonians 2:10; Hebrews 3:12; 1 Peter 3:17-18, etc.)

We are to maintain our original order, and live for God – giving Him all the glory.

But you, beloved, building yourselves up on your most holy faith, praying in the Holy Spirit, keep yourselves in the love of God, looking for the mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ unto eternal life. And on some have compassion, making a distinction; but others save with fear, pulling them out of the fire, hating even the garment defiled by the flesh.

Now to Him who is able to keep you from stumbling, and to present you faultless before the presence of His glory with exceeding joy, to God our Savior, Who alone is wise, be glory and majesty, dominion and power, both now and forever. Amen. Jude 1:20-25