Friends, please pray for me. I’ve truly come so far in my healing from the sexual assault I endured at 13, but every now and again, a moment hits me and I feel like I’m grieving what happened all over again. That happened to me not that long ago and now I just feel drained. I hate even thinking about it but I also know if I ignore it, it just sits and festers inside me. Keep your babies safe, friends. Don’t be paranoid but trust your gut and remember that over 90% of reported child sexual assaults takes place by someone the child knows and trusts (and that’s just the reported cases). It’s easy to believe only monsters could do such a thing, but sadly they aren’t always so blatantly obvious as that. The man who assaulted me was my sister’s ex-brother in-law. Known and trusted by her ex-husband’s family for over 20+ years, he worked with my brother in-law and was invited to every wedding, barbecue, family gathering, hunting trip, etc. Sexual assault has a lifelong impact. Be willing to offend to protect your child more than fear being wrong. Thank you, L, for following your instincts and being willing to act to end what was happening to me. ♥ Thank you for the prayers.
“Yea, mine own familiar friend, in whom I trusted,
which did eat of my bread, hath lifted up his heel against me”
“For it was not an enemy that reproached me;
then I could have borne it:
neither was it he that hated me that did magnify himself against me;
then I would have hid myself from him:
But it was thou, a man mine equal, my guide, and mine acquaintance.
We took sweet counsel together,
and walked unto the house of God in company.”
Dear Lord as I come to you today
Fill my heart and my whole being
with the wonder of your presence
I purpose to rejoice, even as I am reviled
and even as it’s by sweet friends of old.
Lord surround me in your presence.
Fill me with Your love.
This is my comfort in my affliction, For Your word has given me life.
Shanna and Toby are friends of a dear friend. They are excited to be expecting the arrival of their new baby June of ’09. They are also frightened because they lost their first baby due to miscarriage but have hope in that they have been given a precious son who is now two years old. They’ve had an ultrasound and the technician revealed that though the HcG levels are where they should be, there is no baby to be found. Now I know that technicians can be wrong and I also know that God can do miracles, so if there weren’t ever a good time before now, now is the time to pray! They have an appointment on Wednesday or Thursday to recheck Shanna’s hormone levels to see if they’ve doubled or dropped. So please agree with me in prayer over this family. May God be glorified!
Lord, God, Mighty is Your name. Father, I lift up Shanna and Toby to you right now, in the authority and awesome name of Jesus Christ. May You draw near to them during this special and frightful time in their life. Draw them to you and deliver them as they search to fill this void in their hearts. Give them the hope that only You can provide, and reveal who You are to them, that they may put their trust in You and declare what You are capable of and will do. Though their soul is full of troubles, and their life draws near to the grave, give them peace and rest and redemption. Do not give up on them. Deliver them and protect them from the enemy. Lord, God I pray and cry out for their repentance and for them to see You and follow You. That they may walk prudently and go to Your house; and draw near to hear rather than to give the sacrifice of fools, for they do not know that they do evil. May they draw near to you with mind and mouth but most importantly with their hearts. It is only You who can draw them, Father. Only You can cause them to come to You. Draw them, Lord. Be their comforter and hope, be their blessing and triumph. May they praise Your name with the glory that surrounds them and cry out to You in their pain and fears. Lord, I pray that they draw nearer to You than ever before… draw near to them!
Father I pray for this precious little one in Shanna’s womb. I believe in miracles and I believe that even if this baby has been lost, that You are a restorer of LIFE. Show who You are in their life and cause this precious life that You’ve created to flourish and thrive. Give them Your wisdom in how to best provide for their precious wonder. Give the doctors wisdom and clear the way for a healthy and safe pregnancy and delivery. We trust in Your power and might and we trust in Your Will and will praise and trust in Your awesome plan. You are great and magnificent. Be blessed through them in Jesus’ powerful and matchless name. Amen!
Please agree in prayer with me and continue to pray for me as the Lord may lead you. I’m having an especially hard day and I must take action before the enemy wins this battle! I’ve allowed him a foothold and I hope to take it back from under him and knock him down in the process. Thank you!
Lord, I pray that You would help me establish the necessary relationship between my children and I. Help me to shower them with respect and honor and expect it from them as a result. Lord help me teach my children in such a way that they would value my approval more than the lure of any indulgence. Help me to enjoy my precious children and inevitably have them enjoy me in return. Help me to become the Mama whom they can trust. Help me to give them my time, attention, laughter, approval, touch, hugs, desires, silliness, fun, play and training. Help me so they can they bask in my quiet, friendly, and meek temperance and enjoy my smiles. Help me only correct with firm rebuke on the necessary occasions and help it to be lost in the midst of our fellowship with one another. Help me to provide a home full of safety, security, stability, and strength that allows them the confidence and freedom to be all You have created them for. Help me to care for them in a new way and help me enjoy their company. Help me to smile, laugh, and have fun. Help me to reach out and touch them, hug them, and shower them with the loving affection that I can lavish. Lead me in how to train them in their problem areas. Lead me with Your Word to stay calm and always be relaxed in my responses to them. Help me so I only reject the negative actions and never my children. Help me control my mouth and the words that roll off my tongue, that they may never be short or abusive as well as the attitude that represents my heart. Help me to stand in the authority over my flesh that You’ve restored to me through the power of the Holy Spirit. Help me to fill my home with love, joy, peace, patience, and kindness. Lord, help me have compassion on my children. Soften my heart towards them. I plead with You Lord, God, I can’t do this on my own. I need Your strength, Your comforting words of encouragement, and Your hand of leading. Build this home and establish your throne inside! Create in us a humble spirit striving only to serve You! In Jesus powerful name I pray that all this and more than I can even fathom of Your greatness would fill the rooms of my home – that all Your wonderful and precious riches would consume our lives and hearts in such a way that it would overflow!! I thank You Lord for Your faithfulness! Continue to be all that You are and remember us oh Lord! Lord, God please remember us!
We have a leak. Okay, we have running water in the bathroom that fills a 2 quart bowl in just 20 minutes. Apparently the area around the nozzle is completely rotted out. And so, the gutting out of the sink will begin today… lovely right! haha
Well, because of the leak, we have to keep watch over the bowl and continue to empty it and since our washer is not currently working we’ve been using it to flush the toilet with as often as we go. So we have a bowl of water in our sink all day.
Last night after getting home, we put the girls to bed and after her polite request, we allowed our daughter to go to sleep in our bed until she fell asleep and then we’d go in and put her in hers. As it was, it had been a very long day for me, not to mention I’ve been quite tired anyway and I stayed up way too late the last few nights, so I was very tired and dozed in and out on the day bed with my husband watching Rambo and Star Wars.
My oldest daughter got up several times needing her back scratched, asking for hugs and kisses, wanting her hair taken out of its pig tails etc. etc. We don’t allow this and finally we did our job and demanded that she stop playing around or she’d go to sleep in her own bed. Her last request was that she needed to go potty. We said to go and then get in bed.
I again dozed off but awoke to hearing a metal bowl and splashing water. I asked my husband if he saw DD#1 go back to bed and he said he wasn’t paying attention. I got up and walked into the bathroom to see my oldest playing in the water. I corrected her (as she knows this is not allowed), and sent her back to bed. When I went back in to clean up the mess, I discovered she wasn’t just splashing in the water.
She had cut her hair.
Yes, my nearly 4 year old daughter (she’ll be 4 in just 2 weeks) had been watching me cut my hair that morning because my bangs were “getting too long” and decided it was appropriate for her to do so. As bothered as I was, I’m glad she didn’t poke her eye out.
On the one hand I’m shaking my head in disbelief and her thought process (I went in to ask her if she cut her hair and she said “Yes, it was getting too long”), and on the other I’m completely dismayed at how she stopped there. She didn’t think for a moment that what she was doing was wrong (aside from sneaking into the bathroom and playing in the water). She saw that she had a legitimate reason for picking up the forbidden scissors and using them on herself. This all would have been avoided if I had one, taken care of the scissors when I was done with them and two, had got to bed at a decent hour to be more diligent in watching over her. My standard isn’t that she is fine and no harm done, my standard is what my job was in that situation and I missed the mark.
And so I’m putting this post in my prayer requests… hearing the words from my mouth coming out of hers caused a smile along with the matter of fact look on her face as she said it, but these things are the surface and are not looking at the heart of the matter. In order for me to teach these qualities of saying no to temptation and of self-control, I must first allow God to mold me into His likeness – for me to first implement these things in my own life! I need to stop being selfish and let go of certain things in my life that I know are interfering with my job. I must be with my children more and stop doing things that interfere with that.
Lord help me to take this on with You as my Motivator and my Strength!
Please keep us in your prayers!